Self-confidence – we all want more of it, right?
We look at the people we admire – our friends, family, and colleagues – and we are amazed by their self-confidence.
We wonder how people can put themselves out there so easily, and we convince ourselves that they must simply be “born with it.” Or we tell ourselves that self-esteem just “comes naturally” for certain people.
And while this might be true for a select few, for most people it’s not. In fact, for most people self-confidence is an ongoing process that requires continual work.
So while the good news is this: self-confidence is available for everyone.
The challenge is this: self-confidence is available for everyone, and it requires a lot of work.
But guess what?
You can do hard things. You can put in the work. And you too can gain that self-confidence.
How?
By practicing my 3 self-confidence boosters every single day.
Are you ready to learn what they are?
Great! Then let’s dive in.
3 Self-Confidence Boosters
Celebrate Your Core Values
The first step to boosting your self-confidence is to highlight and celebrate your core values.
What are core values, you ask? Great question!
Your core values are the guidelines by which we live our lives. They represent our beliefs, our principles, and the way we show up in the world.
You see, when you know your specific values, and you recognize the core traits that are truly valuable to you, you help uncover the confidence you need to show up according to those beliefs.
To help my clients develop their core values, I often have them reflect on the following four questions:
- What is important to me?
- What do I love doing?
- When do I feel the most alive?
- How do I want to be remembered?
Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. Simply spend some time reflecting on and answering these questions.
Self-Confidence Boosters
Next, use those answers to help you identify 3-5 core values that define your life and beliefs.
Some example core values might include:
- Motivation
- Passion
- Positivity
- Dependability
- Honesty
- Hard working
- Courage
- Service
- Integrity
- Empathy
- Respect
- Responsibility
- Bold
- Helpful
- Leadership
Once you have your values established, I challenge you to regularly spend time reflecting on them.
Any time that you’re second-guessing a situation, worrying about a scenario, or lacking self-confidence, ask yourself: is this situation strengthening or reflecting a core value?
If so, keep on keeping on, friend. You’re pursuing your authentic dreams.
Focus on What You Want
When we’re feeling self-conscious or lacking confidence, it often means we’re focusing on scarcity.
We worry that we’re not enough, we don’t have enough, or there won’t be enough.
Rather than focusing on the negative, however, I challenge you to try this simple self-confidence booster: focus on what you want.
You see, what you focus on expands. So when you focus on your core values, and you reflect on what you want rather than what you don’t have, you bring those things into your life.
What’s more, this practice is self-fulfilling.
The more you believe, the more results you will have. And the more results you will have, the more self-confidence you will feel. And the more self-confidence you feel, the more you believe.
Does this sound a bit too “woo-woo” for you? I dare you to give it a try for two weeks.
Think about whatever is causing you to worry. Then, rather than focusing on the negative, focus on what you want instead. Next, write down the positive scenario in the present tense as if it has already happened. Do this every single day for two weeks.
See what happens. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
Develop an Opinion
When someone asks you where you want to go for dinner do you reply: “I don’t mind. Anywhere is great.”
If someone asks you: “what can I bring to the party?” Do you respond: “Whatever you’d like!”
If so, then I challenge you to form an opinion about these little things.
While you might be thinking this mindset makes you laid back and easy going, it also tells your brain that your opinion doesn’t matter.
But your opinion does matter, friend.
It matters a lot.
And it’s time that you celebrate it.
So next time someone asks your opinion on something, offer an answer. Doing so not only teaches your brain that your opinions matter, but it also strengthens your confidence for when the bigger questions arise.
There you have it, friends! My top 3 self-confidence boosters.
Question:
What are you favorite self-confidence boosters? How do you increase your self-esteem? Share your tips below!