When Things Feel Hard With ADHD

You know those times when you fall out of your rhythm?

Maybe you overlook more details than usual, or things slip through the cracks more frequently? 

Me too. It happens to all of us, especially when we have ADHD.

In fact, something happened just last week that tried to throw me for a loop.

woman looking worried

And I share all about it on episode 178 of the I’m Busy Being Awesome podcast.

Tune in below to find out what happened, while also learning to:

  • Normalize that we all make mistakes or overlook details
  • Give yourself grace when these situations happen
  • Put things into perspective and move forward with greater confidence

You can listen to the episode above or stream it on your favorite podcasting app here:   

Prefer to read? No problem! Keep scrolling for the entire podcast transcript.

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Episode #178: When Things Feel Hard With ADHD (Transcript)

When things feel hard as an adult with ADHD

Do you know those times when you fall out of your normal rhythm? It happens to the best of us – especially when we have ADHD – and I am no exception.

Case in point, this week’s podcast episode.

Typically, I like to record my episodes with some lead time. I prefer having a couple of weeks between when I schedule the podcast, and when it releases to give myself some wiggle room.

Last week, I thought I was in that situation. I thought I had worked ahead at least four weeks and was feeling pretty proud. In fact, just this weekend, I was thinking, “I don’t think I’ve ever been this far scheduled out. Way to go! Way to get your stuff planned and work ahead!” 

Then, I realized I was wrong. 

Normally, my podcast comes out on Mondays at midnight Eastern Time. I do that intentionally because I want to make sure that everybody listening, wherever you are in the world, can start your week with the podcast. 

On Monday at about 7:30 pm, I opened up my podcast app. I was going to listen to some other podcasts, and I realized my podcast did not update with all of the other Monday podcasts that I usually see in my feed. “That’s weird,” I thought. 

I clicked over to my podcast, and I dragged it down. Did it show up when it was refreshed? Nope. Then I quit the app, reopened it, and checked again. Nope, still didn’t work again.

Now I’m getting a little worried because maybe my podcast didn’t come out as planned. 

Then, I checked Libsyn, where I host my podcast. That’s when I realized my mistake. I accidentally scheduled that day’s podcast for the week ahead. In other words, I skipped an entire week in December when planning. Apparently, the week of December 12th did not exist in my mind when I planned this month. 

I know I am time blind, but this is NEXT LEVEL. I missed an entire week!

So switched the release date to that day and published the podcast much later than usual that Monday night. Then, I had to record another episode on Tuesday for the following week. 

Some days you’re busy being awesome…Some days you forget December includes the 11th to the 17th.

I wanted to share this story with you as a reminder that this stuff happens, and that’s okay. Do I love it when it happens? No, but it’s okay. 

I was thinking about this because the past version of me would have gotten hard on herself. She would have added it to her evidence bank of all the reasons why she can never get her act together. This current version of me gets it. 

Do I feel a little annoyed thinking I’m a week further behind than I thought? Yes.

But again, that’s okay. It’s no big deal! Sometimes we just have these days.

With that in mind, I wanted to share with you this beautiful sentence that I think is so direct and so true. One of my clients mentioned this to me recently, and they said… 

“I just feel like being a person is really hard this week.” 

Oh my gosh…so much yes to this sentence! There is just so much truth here. There are some days, and some weeks, where being a person is just really hard. Full stop. 

What I love about this sentence is that it’s such a beautiful example of self-compassion. It is spoken from this place of acceptance and non-judgment. Sometimes it’s really hard to be a human, and this is one of those times. 

Accepting This Week Is Difficult

I’m going to give myself the space to be with the suck right now. I know I’m going to come out on the other side, right? 

It’s not: 

  • “What is my problem?” 
  • “Why can’t I get this right?”
  • “Why haven’t I gotten my act together yet?”
  • “I’m so terrible with planning.”
  • “I’m never going to learn.”
  • “Why can’t I just be happy like everyone else?” 

…..and all the other stories that we might tell ourselves. 

Removing Judgment When You Have ADHD

Removing judgment gives us permission to be humans, not robots.

To let things be hard sometimes because that’s the way of it.

Sometimes it’s hard to be a person. As people, I don’t think it’s our goal to feel happy all the time. I remember when I first heard this, it just blew my mind. It’s not our goal to be happy all the time.

Even though your brain might be thinking that’s what we’re supposed to do. 

Allowing yourself To Feel

woman looking sad

You don’t need to feel happy all the time. We can just feel the emotions that come up.

Happiness is one experience on this large buffet of emotions, however, there are so many other emotions there for us to experience. We are built to experience that full spectrum of emotion. That’s why we can feel them. 

If we didn’t know some of the more uncomfortable emotions, like sadness, we wouldn’t know joy. We wouldn’t know the opposite. If we didn’t know loneliness, we wouldn’t know connection.

We need that opposition. We need to feel all of it. 

Aren’t We Supposed To Feel Happy All The Time?

If your brain is thinking, “I thought we were supposed to feel happy all the time, I thought that was the goal.” 

What if the goal is to feel that nothing is wrong with you if you feel these uncomfortable emotions?

Nothing has gone wrong. It is part of being a person on this planet.

In the wise words of my client, “Sometimes being a person is hard” and that’s okay. This message might not be landing with you right now, today. That’s great, but keep it in your back pocket as a reminder. 

If you are:

  • Scrambling to get all those last-minute details ready for your winter solstice party, Christmas, Kwanzaa, or New Year’s
  • Realizing you just missed an entire week in your planning and you’re feeling behind
  • Navigating a health challenge right now
  • Figuring out some challenges in your relationships
  • Feeling overwhelmed with all the things

If that’s you, I want you to know that I see you, and I get it. You are not alone.

Sometimes, being a person is hard. This might be one of those times, and that’s okay.

Give yourself the space you need, and know that I am here cheering you on.

You, my friend, are busy being awesome. 

Take Action When Things Feel Hard

If you’re ready to take the concepts that you’ve learned here and apply them to your life, and ready to learn how to support your ADHD in a way that works best for you, within a small supportive community, then check out We’re Busy Being Awesome. It’s my small group coaching program for ADHD brains just like you. Learn how to release perfectionism, strengthen the links, and work with your brain in a way that’s supportive for you. You can learn more here and sign up!

Want To Join Our Group Coaching Program?!

I will be opening the doors for the next cohort of We’re Busy Being Awesome in a couple of weeks!

Add your name to the waitlist so you’ll be the first to know about program dates and times, plus how you can sign up if it’s a great fit for you.

If you haven’t already, make sure you grab the podcast roadmap. It has the most popular episodes all detailed for you so you can get yourself up to speed and ready to work with your ADHD brain. You can grab it now through the link in the show notes or head to imbusybeingawesome.com/map.

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