How To Better Use Reminders & Notifications with ADHD

Let me ask you—how many times have you been told to set a reminder for something? Maybe a friend said, “Just put it in your calendar!” Or a coworker suggested, “Why don’t you set an alert?” Or maybe you’ve even heard me say it on the podcast: “Try setting a reminder here.” So you did. You set the reminder, feeling confident you’d actually remember this time.

And then… you didn’t. Maybe the reminder popped up at the worst possible moment. Or it got lost in a flood of other notifications. Or you swiped it away before your brain even registered what it said. Yeah. Been there.

That’s exactly what we’re exploring today on episode 296 of the I’m Busy Being Awesome podcast: why our ADHD brains often stop noticing notifications, why our reminders don’t actually remind us, and how to reset our system so we actually see—and act on—the things that matter.

https://youtu.be/jH8sIMsJ51U

Listen to the episode above or stream it on your favorite podcasting app. Prefer to read? No problem! Keep scrolling for a summary of the key takeaways.

Episode #296: How To Better Use Reminders & Notifications with ADHD (Transcript)

Are you ready to talk about all-things reminders, notifications, and how to actually leverage them as support today? Excellent.

Let’s get started. First up, let’s take a look at why we stop seeing these notifications in the first place.

Why We Stop Seeing Notifications

So, why do we stop noticing our notifications?

I mean, we set reminders for a reason. We want them to work. We want to remember that appointment, that deadline, or to flip the laundry from the washer to the dryer. So why do we swipe away notifications without even reading them?

Well, a few things are happening here.

1. Too many notifications = we stop noticing them

Our brains are constantly filtering information. Every day, we’re bombarded with emails, messages, app alerts, calendar reminders, and breaking news notifications. And when everything competes for our attention, it all starts blending together.

Just like the prioritization saying: when everything matters, nothing matters. The same is true with notifications.

We can’t actually see what matters anymore.

Think about it like this: Have you ever walked into a cluttered room or noticed that when your desk has lots and lots of stuff on it, it seems a bit harder to focus? We seem to be distracted by all the noise and can’t actually focus on the thing that matters. Well, that’s exactly what happens when our notification center is overloaded.

At first, maybe we do notice a few of the reminders we set. But after a while, our brain learns: “Most of this stuff isn’t actually important.” And it simply adds to the digital clutter of our notification stack.

Eventually, we start automatically swiping, dismissing, or tuning out—sometimes without even realizing it.

Our ADHD brains struggle to filter out the important notifications from the noise.

2. Decision fatigue makes notifications harder to process

The second reason our notifications and reminders lose their effectiveness is that every time a notification pops up, it presents a micro-decision.

We often have so many of these unnecessary decisions embedded in all our notifications. For example:

• Do I need to check this right now?
• Is this important?
• Can I ignore this?
• Should I respond?
• What if I forget about it later?

Multiply that by 50+ notifications a day, and it’s no surprise we see them as less important.

Instead of engaging with the alerts, we just… swipe them away. Because it’s easier than making another decision in an already overstimulated brain.

3. The timing is all wrong

Another reason reminders stop working for our ADHD brains — this is a big one for me— they don’t always show up when we can actually act on them.

Let’s say you set a reminder to check your email at 1 PM.

But at 1 PM, you’re in the middle of a conversation, deep in focus, or making lunch for the kids. Your brain isn’t primed for that task in that moment, so the reminder pops up, and… swipe. Gone.

And unless you have a backup system in place, that reminder is now lost to the abyss.

For a notification to really work, it has to appear at a moment when we can actually do something about it—or have a backup system in place so it comes back around when we can do something. Otherwise, it’s just another interruption.

4. External noise vs. internal noise

And finally, another obstacle when it comes to seeing and actually responding to notifications and reminders is that ADHD brains already have a lot going on internally.

We’re juggling ideas, mentally rewriting that email we need to send, remembering we need to pick up dog food, wondering if we paid that bill yet, and oh yeah—what was that thing I needed to do at 3 PM?

So when an external notification comes in—especially if it’s not urgent—our brain pushes it aside in favor of whatever’s already taking up space in our working memory.

It’s not that we don’t care about the reminder. It’s just that, in that moment, it doesn’t seem as immediately relevant as what’s already happening in our head.

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3 Steps To Use ADHD Reminders More Effectively

If reminders don’t actually remind us… what’s the fix?

That’s what we’re talking about next:

• How to reset your notifications
• Cut out the noise
• Ensure the reminders and notifications you do keep actually get noticed

The goal here isn’t just to set more reminders—it’s to set up the ones you actually need at the right time while eliminating the rest.

Step 1: Start from a Clean Slate

Alright, so now that we understand why our notifications stop working, let’s talk about the fix.

And as a heads up, step one of the process is likely going to sound extreme.

Turn. Your. Notifications. Off. All of them. (Almost)

Now, a few caveats I want to make clear: You know your non-negotiables. If there’s an app that must absolutely be on at all times for work, caretaking, or something critical. If you have an insulin reader that alerts you if your sugars have dropped or something, do NOT turn those off.

If you have alerts that tell you there’s water in your basement when there shouldn’t be, do not turn those off. So use your judgment here; you know what those non-negotiables are. Leave those on.

So aside from the apps that come standard on your phone—text messages, phone calls, possibly calendar alerts if they’re actually dialed in, and any non-negotiable apps—everything else? Off.

Yes, that means almost every app you’ve downloaded on your phone.

Not just the random ones that annoy you. Not just the ones you think you don’t need. I’m talking a full-on notification detox.

Because here’s the reality—most of what’s buzzing your phone isn’t actually that important to begin with.

What If I Miss Something Important?

Now, your brain may absolutely freak out about this. I get it. Turning off everything might seem risky at first. You might be thinking:

• “But what if I forget to check my email?”
• “What if I miss something important in the news?”

That fear makes sense.

Here’s what I want you to consider:

• How many notifications do you get in a day?
• How many of them truly required your attention at that exact moment?
• How many were just background noise?

By turning everything off for a few days, you give your brain a chance to recalibrate. You’ll start noticing what you actually need, what you actually miss, and—more importantly—what you don’t.

And if you’re worried about forgetting something important? Make a note of the notifications you think you’ll miss. Then, set ONE reminder in your phone to check that list in a day or two. See if you actually needed those notifications back on.

Take Action

So, take five minutes right now—you could even do it while you’re listening to this episode—(or later today) and go into your settings.

Turn off everything from the apps you’ve downloaded.

Again, I think text messages, calls, and possibly calendar alerts, and definitely your non negotiable apps are fine to keep on. But everything else? Off.

Then, give it a few days. See how you feel. Notice what you naturally check on your own.

When you do get that urge to check something, ask yourself:

• Was this actually urgent?
• Or was I just conditioned to respond to the buzz?
• Do I need a notification here?

This step is all about resetting your system so that when we start adding things back, we do it intentionally.

How to Turn Off Notifications on iPhone (iOS)

1. Open the Settings app.
2. Tap “Notifications.”
3. Scroll through the list of apps and tap on each one individually.
4. Toggle “Allow Notifications” OFF to completely disable alerts for that app.
5. Repeat for all apps you want to mute.

How to Turn Off Notifications on Android

(Exact steps may vary slightly depending on your device brand.)

1. Open the Settings app.
2. Tap “Notifications” or “Apps & Notifications.”
3. Select “App Notifications” or “Manage Notifications.”
4. Scroll through the list of apps and tap on each one individually.
5. Toggle “Show Notifications” OFF to fully disable alerts for that app.

Step 2: Be Intentional About What You Add Back

Now, think about which notifications actually serve you.

Remember, ADHD brains thrive with clarity and simplicity. We don’t want to be wasting our executive functions trying to decide what matters most amidst a sea of unimportant notifications—so categorize what actually deserves your attention.

Sample Categories:

• Critical alerts: Calls, texts from key contacts, urgent reminders.
• Time-sensitive needs: Calendar events, scheduled commitments, medication if you take that at a certain time. Home alert type apps in case the smoke detector is going off or something.
• Supportive nudges: Medication reminders, habit trackers (but only if you actually respond to them).

Bonus tip: If you tend to swipe away reminders without reading them, and you actually do want to keep them, consider changing how they appear.

Step 3: Create a Monthly Check-In System

It’s always helpful to have a regular reset, since what works now might not work in a month.

To do this, set a recurring appointment in your calendar (yes, the irony!) to reassess your notifications.

Then ask yourself:

• Are these still helpful?
• Am I actually responding to them, or just dismissing them?
• Do I need to tweak anything?

This doesn’t have to be a big project—just a quick check-in to keep your system working for you.

Bonus: Pair this with an existing monthly habit (e.g., reviewing your goals, budgeting, or doing a deep clean of your to-do list).

How To Reintroduce Reminders (That Work)

Now that we’ve talked through our 3-step process, I also want to explore the specifics.

What are some different ways we can bring back notifications in a way that actually serves us?

Note: I am an iOS user through and through. In fact, when I was growing up, my dad worked for Apple, so that’s all I’ve ever really used; I have no idea how to make Android or a PC work properly.

So, the strategies I’m sharing today are based on the iPhone and the iPhone settings, but I did have a conversation with my good friend chat GPT to ask for Android equivalents, and hopefully, this will help give the Android users a good place to start as well.

So now that we’ve turned off all the noise, let’s talk about how to bring back only what actually serves us.

1. Use Scheduled Summary

Scheduled Summary is a built-in iOS feature that groups non-urgent notifications together and delivers them at a set time, rather than interrupting you all day.

It’s perfect if you still want to see certain updates—but on your terms.

I think this can be really useful for the notifications you realize you want to keep around, but you don’t want them distracting you throughout the day. 

This might include:

• News updates
• Social media notifications
• A notification from your favorite store,
• Non-time sensitive banking or subscription updates

When you go through the process of turning back on the apps you missed, if you ask yourself: “do I need to hear about this right now, or can it wait until my scheduled summary?” I have a sneaking suspicion that the majority that you’re turning back on could be a scheduled summary unless they are the very time-sensitive items.

For example, if you travel a lot, you might keep your notifications from the airlines you fly set to “on” because you want to know if your plane is on time or if your gate has changed.

You probably don’t need to know about the latest trend report about sleep patterns from your Oura ring app the moment it’s available. You could probably be just fine seeing that at a scheduled time in the evening after the work day ends.

Essentially, this is an opportunity for you to take control of your attention and decide intentionally when you want these companies to be able to tap you on the shoulder and take up some of your precious time.

How to Set Up Scheduled Summary iOS:

1. Go to Settings > Notifications.
2. Tap “Scheduled Summary.”
3. Toggle it ON.
4. Select the apps you want to include in the summary.
   • Choose apps that send frequent but non-urgent alerts, like news, social media, or shopping apps.
5. Set your preferred summary times (morning, afternoon, evening—whatever works for you).

Now, instead of being bombarded all day, you’ll get a batch of notifications at set times.

Android Alternatives

I believe that Android has a similar feature called Notification Digest on some Samsung devices and Notification Summary in other Android versions.

Essentially, I believe it’s a similar approach. Go to settings, the notifications, then advanced settings, and notification digest and toggle it on. Then you can choose the apps you want to batch in a scheduled summary and set the delivery times.

2. Customizing How Your Notifications Show Up

By now, you’ve cut out the noise and added back only the notifications that actually serve you.

Here’s the last step for the people who love to tinker with tech…

Make sure those notifications show up in a way that works for you. If you’re not into that kind of thing, you’re done! Success! But if you like to tinker…

Both iPhone and Android give you tons of options for organizing notifications—things like:

• Whether you want to see a count of unread notifications, a stack grouped by app, or a full list of everything.
• Whether you want alerts on your lock screen, just in your notification center, or popping up as banners.
• Whether you want them to make a sound, stay silent, or just vibrate.

And listen, if you love tweaking settings and want to dial in every last detail, go for it! A quick search in ChatGPT or Google for “how to customize notifications on [your phone model]” will walk you through exactly where to find everything.

If that sounds overwhelming? Here’s the simple approach:

• If a notification grabs your attention at the wrong time, adjust where and how it appears.
• If you keep swiping away an alert without reading it, try a different display setting or turn it off completely.
• If something feels distracting, experiment with adding it to the notification summary instead.

The goal isn’t to make notifications perfect—it’s to make them useful. So set it up once, see how it works, and tweak as you go.

At the end of the day, notifications should work for you, not against you.

Effectively Using Reminders for ADHD – Recap

Today, we tackled the notification overload problem and how to actually make reminders work for us.

Here are the three big takeaways…

1. Too many notifications = we stop seeing them. When everything is competing for our attention, nothing actually seems important. So, if you’ve ever wondered why your reminders don’t remind you… this is why.
2. Turn everything off first (except for the non-negotiables) → then only add back what’s necessary. Instead of trying to tweak notifications one by one, start from a clean slate. You’ll quickly notice which alerts you actually need—because they’re the ones you’ll naturally check for.
3. Do a monthly check-in. It’s helpful to have a regular reset— since what works now might not work in a month. So build in a quick check-in to reassess what’s helping and what’s just more noise.

And of course, I want to hear how this experiment goes for you!

• Send me a DM over @imbusyebingawesome ****—what notifications did you actually miss? What stayed off? What surprised you the most?

When we share what works, we help each other find new ways to work with our brains—not against them.

👉 Want to take these concepts further and apply them to your life? Learn more about how we can work together with my small group coaching program, “We’re Busy Being Awesome,” and one-on-one coaching.

⭐ Learn my simple step-by-step approach to locking in a routine and making it stick, be sure to check out my free course, the ADHD Routine Revamp.

Links From The Podcast

• Learn more about private coaching here
• Learn more about We’re Busy Being Awesome here
• Get the top 10 tips to work with your ADHD brain (free ebook!) here
• Discover my favorite ADHD resources here
• Get the I’m Busy Being Awesome Planning System here
• Get the Podcast Roadmap here
• Take my free course, ADHD Routine Revamp, here

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Listen to the episode above or stream it on your favorite podcasting app. Prefer to read? No problem! Keep scrolling for a summary of the key takeaways.